just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
