Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize