U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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