I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
