I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
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