So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
