I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I am one with the molecules
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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