Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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