If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I am one with the molecules
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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