I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
