they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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