The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
tell me about the fingering
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
