just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Naked. naked and bneed help.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
