I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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