no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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