Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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