WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
