Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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