Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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