I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Randomize
