this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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