Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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