Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
