Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize