Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
