Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
