it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
