I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
