The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
