Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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