please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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