he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
