we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
