dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
