I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
