Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
