I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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