i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
