I wish I could punch you in the face.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
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