is your mom at the bar?
i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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