This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
