How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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