I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
