I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
