You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
