Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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