wake up i wanna do it froggy style
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
