i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize