tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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