How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
