you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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