Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
only if we run a train.
done.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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